221: 1-on-1 with Kirill: What I learned in 2018

Episode Summary

Executive Summary: Kirill Aramenko reflects on his top seven learnings from 2018, spanning health, relationships, productivity, and self-awareness. He emphasizes fasting and skipping breakfast, showing care for loved ones, protecting personal space, focusing via Essentialism, using Tony Robbins’ RPM for results-driven planning, doing what you want rather than others’ expectations, and recognizing and exiting the victim–rescuer–persecutor drama triangle.

Main Topics: Health experimentation and fasting: Kirill describes a 10-day supervised fast in Bali, the effects of ketosis, toxin release, weight loss, and how it led him to stop eating breakfast and adopt a two-meal routine. Being present for loved ones: He stresses noticing when people are struggling, reaching out with love and support, and avoiding the urge to immediately fix or control their situation. Personal space and self-reflection: Kirill argues that everyone needs solitude to recharge and self-reflect, and describes intentionally creating monthly time away from social media and distractions. Essentialism and focus: He highlights Greg McKeown’s Essentialism as a transformative book that taught him to identify the one essential priority and avoid choice paralysis and scattered effort. RPM (Rapid Planning Method) and results-driven productivity: Kirill explains Tony Robbins’ RPM system—Result, Purpose, Massive Action Plan—and how it shifted his business toward outcome-based planning and stronger motivation. Doing what you want: He encourages listeners to identify their own desires and resist defaulting to other people’s expectations, cultural pressure, or social conditioning. Victim consciousness / drama triangle: He introduces Stephen Karpman’s drama triangle—victim, rescuer, persecutor—as a framework for understanding many interpersonal conflicts and urges awareness to step out of it.

Key Arguments: A 10-day supervised fast showed him that missing meals is manageable and can help reset eating habits; it also led to a long-term change in his routine. People often need support before they ask for it, so love can be expressed by simply being present rather than trying to fix them. Personal space is necessary for everyone to recharge, avoid losing oneself in constant stimulation, and maintain self-awareness. Essentialism is powerful because focusing on one essential priority produces more progress than spreading effort across many goals. Tony Robbins’ RPM works because meaningful results require a strong emotional purpose before building a massive action plan. Living according to other people’s expectations can cause people to abandon their own desires and autonomy over time. The victim-rescuer-persecutor triangle explains recurring relationship dynamics and can be used to recognize when you are mentally or emotionally trapped in a destructive role. Exiting the drama triangle often requires awareness and may initially be perceived by others as harsh, but it is healthier in the long run.

Data Points: Episode number: 221 - This is episode number 221 of the Super Data Science Podcast. Top learnings: 7 - Kirill structures the episode around his top seven learnings from 2018. Fast duration: 10 days - He completed a supervised fast in Bali. Calories during fast: 150-200 per day - He says the fasting program included juices totaling roughly 150 to 200 calories daily. Weight lost before fast: 4 kilos - He lost about 4 kg before starting the fast. Weight lost during fast: 4 kilos - He lost another 4 kg during the fast. Breakfast-free period: 6 months - He says he had not eaten breakfast for six months at the time of recording. Fasting daily gap: 15-16 hours - He describes the time between dinner and lunch as a long rest period for digestion. Monthly personal space routine: 1 night per month - He intentionally spends one night per month alone without social media. Business RPM adoption: About 8 months - He says the team had been using RPM weekly for roughly eight months. RPM review cadence: Weekly - Employees submit RPMs every Monday or Tuesday and review them with a buddy. Triangle interactions: Approximately 90% - He claims the drama triangle describes about 90% of human interactions, especially in relationships. Yearly hours: 8,760 hours - He calculates the hours in a year to motivate annual self-reflection.

Pivotal Quotes: "The power actually sits in this letter P and the purpose." — Kirill Aramenko: Explaining Tony Robbins’ RPM framework and why emotional purpose drives follow-through. "Know what you want and do what you want." — Kirill Aramenko: Summarizing his point about resisting external expectations and reclaiming personal agency. "Get out of it as soon as you can." — Kirill Aramenko: His conclusion on stepping out of the victim-rescuer-persecutor drama triangle.

Implications: Listeners are encouraged to use annual reflection, protect attention, and design life around purpose rather than habit or expectation. For teams, the episode suggests that clearer goals and psychologically aware communication can improve motivation, focus, and relationships.